(no subject)

Name / Username: Bree/thisisbree/gunpowdergeek/etc
Age: 20
Location: Usually North Carolina.

Favorite characters: Bela, Bobby, Andy, Cas, Ruby 1.0, Ellen, Azazel, Mary
Least favorite characters: Ruby 2.0 (completely different character), Jo, John
Sam/Dean (Y/N): Hell no.
J2 (Y/N): Hell no x Infinity.
Other pairings: Uh, none.
Favorite Quotes:
"Sam Winchester is the Antichrist? I'd heard something about that. From my good friend the Easter Bunny who heard it from the Tooth Fairy. Are you off your meds?" - Bela
"This is, without a doubt, the dumbest, craziest thing we've ever done, and that's in a long, storied career or dumb and crazy."
"'The X-Files' is a TV show. This is real."
"We know just enough to make us dangerous."
"Dude, I'm not enabling your sick habit. You're like one of those lab rats that pushes the pleasure button instead of the food button until it dies."
"So what do you think we kill some evil sons of bitches and we raise a little hell?"
"Dean: You broke into their e-mail accounts?
Sam: I used some skills that I happen to have to satisfy my curiosity.
Dean: Nice."

Spoilerwhore or Spoilerphobe: I tend to accidentally on purpose read spoilers then end up getting more spoiled than I'd intended. Then I just get really annoyed with myself and end up doing it again the next day.
What do you love most about the show? The writing from s1-3, some of the writing from the past two. The lore, the relationship between the guys, some of the extra characters.
What are your top fandom peeves? Heh. I'm not one to ask about this. But I'll say J2 and Wincest first and foremost.

Other fandoms: Harry Potter I guess, Lonelygirl15, Star Wars, Star Trek, DC and Marvel comics, Sherlock Holmes.
Other interests: Science, libertarianism, ghost hunting, politics, Sherlock Holmes, the supernatural, John Hodgman, Neil Patrick Harris, Tina Fey, Twitter, Harry Potter, Robert Downey, Jr., Nathan Fillion, sci-fi, art, history, Joss Whedon, etc.
What can we expect from your journal? (locked, public, real life, etc?) For it to never be updated.
Other Journals: (Dreamwidth, writing journals, etc.) My blog, there's a link on my Twitter.

A quick explanation of Samhain/All Saint's Day...

A friend of mine made the comment earlier that Halloween was a Christian holiday. I posted about this on Twitter, and it sparked some discussion/rebuttals. So here's my Official Brief History of Halloween.

The Celts, who lived 2,000 years ago in the area that is now Ireland, the United Kingdom, and northern France, celebrated their new year on November 1. This day marked the end of summer and the harvest and the beginning of the dark, cold winter, a time of year that was often associated with human death. Celts believed that on the night before the new year, the boundary between the worlds of the living and the dead became blurred. On the night of October 31, they celebrated Samhain, when it was believed that the ghosts of the dead returned to earth. In addition to causing trouble and damaging crops, Celts thought that the presence of the otherworldly spirits made it easier for the Druids, or Celtic priests, to make predictions about the future. For a people entirely dependent on the volatile natural world, these prophecies were an important source of comfort and direction during the long, dark winter.

To commemorate the event, Druids built huge sacred bonfires, where the people gathered to burn crops and animals as sacrifices to the Celtic deities.

During the celebration, the Celts wore costumes, typically consisting of animal heads and skins, and attempted to tell each other's fortunes. When the celebration was over, they re-lit their hearth fires, which they had extinguished earlier that evening, from the sacred bonfire to help protect them during the coming winter.

By A.D. 43, Romans had conquered the majority of Celtic territory. In the course of the four hundred years that they ruled the Celtic lands, two festivals of Roman origin were combined with the traditional Celtic celebration of Samhain.

The first was Feralia, a day in late October when the Romans traditionally commemorated the passing of the dead. The second was a day to honor Pomona, the Roman goddess of fruit and trees. The symbol of Pomona is the apple and the incorporation of this celebration into Samhain probably explains the tradition of "bobbing" for apples that is practiced today on Halloween.

By the 800s, the influence of Christianity had spread into Celtic lands. In the seventh century, Pope Boniface IV designated November 1 All Saints' Day, a time to honor saints and martyrs. It is widely believed today that the pope was attempting to replace the Celtic festival of the dead with a related, but church-sanctioned holiday. The celebration was also called All-hallows or All-hallowmas (from Middle English Alholowmesse meaning All Saints' Day) and the night before it, the night of Samhain, began to be called All-hallows Eve and, eventually, Halloween. Even later, in A.D. 1000, the church would make November 2 All Souls' Day, a day to honor the dead. It was celebrated similarly to Samhain, with big bonfires, parades, and dressing up in costumes as saints, angels, and devils. Together, the three celebrations, the eve of All Saints', All Saints', and All Souls', were called Hallowmas.

The American tradition of "trick-or-treating" probably dates back to the early All Souls' Day parades in England. During the festivities, poor citizens would beg for food and families would give them pastries called "soul cakes" in return for their promise to pray for the family's dead relatives.

The distribution of soul cakes was encouraged by the church as a way to replace the ancient practice of leaving food and wine for roaming spirits. The practice, which was referred to as "going a-souling" was eventually taken up by children who would visit the houses in their neighborhood and be given ale, food, and money.

The tradition of dressing in costume for Halloween has both European and Celtic roots. Hundreds of years ago, winter was an uncertain and frightening time. Food supplies often ran low and, for the many people afraid of the dark, the short days of winter were full of constant worry. On Halloween, when it was believed that ghosts came back to the earthly world, people thought that they would encounter ghosts if they left their homes. To avoid being recognized by these ghosts, people would wear masks when they left their homes after dark so that the ghosts would mistake them for fellow spirits. On Halloween, to keep ghosts away from their houses, people would place bowls of food outside their homes to appease the ghosts and prevent them from attempting to enter.


 So that's that.

15 year old Bree gets a filling.

I found this on the desktop computer, typed it when I was 15 after a visit to the dentist to get a filling... filled. Awkward. Anyway, it's mildly amusing, I think anyway.

12:30PM-Walk into dentist office.

12:31- Sit in that big chair

12:32- Dental hygienist sneezes

12:32 and 30 seconds- Hope do not catch cold or pneumonia from dental hygienist.

12:33- Dental Hygienist leaves me alone in dentist office.

12:40- Wonder if anyone is comng back.

12:45- Dentist comes in and tells me we're going to get started.

12:47- Dentist numbs my gums.

12:48- They use that big needle... Consider screaming.

12:50- Use big needle on other side.

12:50 and 16 seconds- Wonder how dentist would like it if I poked his leg with big needle. 

12:55- Now that my mouth is numb, they tell me to keep my mouth open while they do God-knows-what in there.

12:57- Lose all feeling in my jaw.

1:00- Wonder why Dental hygienist keeps poking my tongue wth suction tube. Also wonder how she;d like it if I stuck that in her ear.

1:01- Realize Dentist makes me very hostile.

1:03- They paint some nasty smelling stuff on my tooth. Dental hygienist tells me not to get it on my tongue because it has a very bad taste... right after I do.

1:04- Wonder if they will let me get this stuff off my tongue before I puke. 

1:10- After 20 minutes of them poking around in my mouth, Dentist tells me it's time to put the filling in.

1:10 and 45 seconds- They haven't put the filling in yet?!

1:19- We are finally done. I get up and almost run out of there. These people are looney tunes.

Devil's Turnaround (I get the name now).

So yeah, this is from an IM conversation because I haven't typed any kind of report up yet, but I wanted to share out little adventure.

This is what it looked like during the day about a year ago. It's a lot more overgrown now, apparently they don't bother with upkeep very often.
This is what it looked like in the day time about a year ago. A lot more overgrown now.

we knew where the road was, but we'd only been there in the day time
so we had to drive on the road for a few minutes because the entrance had overgrown a good deal
but we drive past it and both started feeling really ill, looked up, and it was right next to us
so we shine our flashlights around a bit to see if it's being patrolled
and it isn't so we're like Should we get out of the car? let's get out of the car
we took a few photos from the car, then got out
we started walking around some and we're both saying Dude, I have a really bad feeling here
Like we both felt really ill and just... I don't know how to describe it. Just not good.
And we're walking around with our flashlights, checking the area out etc
and all of a sudden i felt like my wrist was burning
i wore a bracelet with crosses on it, just as an experiment
baaaad idea
it's faded mostly now, but it looked like the bracelet had burned into my arm
i had seen some lights in the trees when we got closer
they looked kind of like eyes or something, but we were nervously joking at that point so who knows
but after the burning wrist, we started hearing something
like chanting or something strange.
real quiet. we both had to be perfectly still to hear it.
i think that was the point where i twittered "Holy freakin crap"
then i was looking at everything through the camera, not taking pics cause the flash is incredibly bright
and i was looking at all the graves
and one of them had this black looking mist type thing floatin over where the body would be
at which point i showed lyssa, we looked at each other, and ran like hell to the car
i pulled off a neat little dukes of hazzard move that i could probably only ever do again if i was scared to death
i slid across my car hood haha
i didn't even notice i had done it until we were down the road
and we turned the iPod on to that SPN mix and Don't Look Back by Boston started playin
we looked at each other and was like "Yeah, that's a good idea"
but yeah, i've done dozens of places like this. never been anything like that.
we're debating if we want to go back

How to Make Ugly Cookies.

I need to get a picture in here, too.

Ugly Cookies

1 cup (2 sticks) butter
1 cup sugar
2 eggs
2 tsp vanilla
3 and 1/2 cups all purpose flour
2 tsp baking powder

1) Mix the softened (not melted) butter, sugar, eggs, and vanilla
2) Add the flour and baking powder and mix well
3) Chill the dough (stick it in the freezer for about 10 minutes)
4) Roll out dough on floured surface and cut into desired shapes (dough might need more chilling if it gets too soft). Make sure they're still about 1/2 inch thick so they'll puff up like the ugly cookies they are.
5) Bake on an ungreased cookie sheet at 375 for about 10 minutes (or until the edges are lightly browned)...makes about 25 cookies depending on the size

The Icing (not too specific) :

Mix a bunch (3 cups-ish) of powdered sugar with enough water to make it the consistency of a milkshake...not the super thick kind. Mix in a dash of meringue powder (hard to find... Michael's or Hobby Lobby has this). Add desired food colouring (I use gel food coloring because it doesn't make things bitter) and pour the icing over the cooled cookies. With your food colouring, make sure it turns out a really hideous, unappetizing colour. Otherwise they will not be sufficiently ugly. A yucky purple or green colour is preferred.

To harden the icing, stick the cookies in the fridge or freezer for about a half hour...or leave out at room temperature for a really loooong time. I don't recommend the latter. You can store them in Ziploc bags...they don't have to be refrigerated. <input ... ><input ... ><input ... >

SPN 5x21 Recap, anyone?

So I was asked to recap tonight's episode because of all the drama surrounding it on Twitter, etc, and I did. Only I was really, really hyper at the time, so this is what came out.

Um, beware if you have issues with run on sentences, grammar, or logic. Because this defies the rules of all of the above.

So Sam is all hallucinatey in the panic room. Then Dean makes a deal with Cas to dedicate himself to God's plan, then Cas is a dick And breaks Sam out of the panic room. And Sam's likeI'm freeee and Bobby's like Like hell, ya idjit, and Sam's all Okay, just shoot me and Bobby's like *hesitate* and Sam's like KaPOW old man, too slow and Bobbys all like -.- and bobby tells dean when he wakes up but Sam already Found Ruby and at first he's all Lets get it on, then he's like JK I want yo blood so he gets some and Rubys like 3 seals left, mofo! And Sam's like Oh noes, they're after my Lucky Seals! And Rubys like no it's okay, i'm BFFs with Lil's personal chef, so we can chat with her But you might have to torture her a little. And Sams like personal chef? Lilith's a yuppie? And Rubys like You don't wanna know and Lil's Personal chef is like JK, I just steal the babies, I don't prepare them! And Sams all :@ And Dean shows up and he's like Whoa what kinda Crazy party you kids having? And Sam's like I didn't invite you because I think you're being a douche and Deans like Uh no, you're sexing A demon in a dead chicks body and pretending to be Edward Cullen w/o the sparkles, you win the douche award, sucker! And Sam's like *angst* And deans like I can out angst you any day, fool, and Sams like How about if I just punch you in the face instead? And deans like Okay, but Newton's third law, bitch, and punches him back and Sams like Try doing that after I strangle you and Deans all Suffocation, no breathing! And Sams like I can't do it, but I can run away! And deans all Fine, but you best not come knockin on my door again! And Sams all *run*.


Her reaction? "
.... those were the worst sppoilers ever. XD"


You self-righteous bastard!
Under some misguided orders,
You’ve sent us into a war that isn’t ours to fight.

You call yourself an angel of the Lord?
This Lord you serve so blindly,
Have you ever even seen his face?
Or are you taking orders passed down
On some stone tablet from above?

Here I always saw angels as some mighty warriors.
You’re just a coward with wings,
Sending us out to do your dirty work
As if fighting our own demons wasn’t bad enough.
Now I’m living my life by Revelation,
Trying to fight against a swiftly breaking dam.

Standing there in some poor human’s body,
Poor soul didn’t know what he was praying for
By dedicating his body to His service.
How could such a manipulative being as you
Exist in such an unassuming form?

You’re no more holy than I,
Only a pawn in the hands of a controlling God.
Even your brothers, lacking your faith to follow an invisible leader,
They turn to fight against you,
To let this endworld come when it may.

Who am I to stand between angels and demons?
And who are you to tell me I should?
If the world ends not with a bang but a whimper,
I would prefer the silence to battle cries.


This poem is depicting someone speaking to an angel, named Castiel, during a battle to stop the Apocalypse. It is based on the current plot from the show “Supernatural”. The show looks at angels in a different light, something that interested me. Normally we are shown images as holy winged figures standing around the throne of God, worshipping for all of eternity or delivering messages to people on Earth, but the show casts them as mere divine followers, as subject to doubt as any human being.  It is very contrary from what one would expect from reading the Bible, which is plausible, as the Bible would want to show God’s servants in the most positive light. This viewpoint interested me enough to base the angel in my poem on their main angel.

The poem is written from someone who feels like he is being used in the war between angels and demons, becoming, as he accuses Castiel of being, “a pawn in the hands of a controlling God”.  I tried to convey the anger and accusation behind the words by using harsh-sounding words (“self-righteous”, “misguided” and “coward”, for example). The speaker feels betrayed and used by someone who is supposed to be looking out for him.  He is tired of fighting, especially when he does not see any foreseeable good coming from all of their sacrifice. 

I chose not to use any sort of meter or organization for the poem, but instead let it flow as if he was actually saying this out loud. It is still divided up into six stanzas, though, each with its own focus. The first stanza introduces why the speaker is so angry, because he feels like he has been blindly led into a raging war. The first line is quite possibly my favorite. It is completely straightforward and does not hold any of the speaker’s opinion back. He calls Castiel “self-righteous” because of how he feels justified in all of his actions as they are ordered by God. In the second stanza, Castiel is accused of not even knowing the God he takes orders from without question. He even goes so far as to mock the concept of the Ten Commandments being handed down on two stone tablets and how the Israelites had to follow them without concrete proof they were from God. In the third stanza, the speaker is admitting his disillusionment with angels because of his dealings with Castiel. He believed what he read in the Bible and in storybooks, that angels were mighty, holy warriors of God, and now that he has seen the truth, he does not know what to believe any more.  “Now I live my life by Revelation” refers to the book of Revelation in the Bible, which foretells the events leading up to the Apocalypse. He feels like he is not enough to stop the proverbial dam from breaking, the dam being the end of the world.

The fourth stanza contains the imagery of a spiritual being (the angel) inhabiting a man who prayed that God would use him as He saw fit. The angel is essentially possessing the man’s body for his use while on Earth, taking away the man’s free will, which the speaker considers an immoral thing to do. It is even misleading for those who look at him and assume he is just a harmless Earthly man. In the fifth stanza, the speaker condemns the angel for this and points out to him that God is likely only using him as well. Other angels even doubt God’s will and have decided that they would rather allow the Apocalypse to come than fight, in turn fighting against Castiel and those trying to stop it. I was reluctant to use the word “Apocalypse”, opting instead for “endworld”, as it is more straightforward. “Apocalypse” has lost some of its weight as a word after years of being used in pop culture and movies. By saying “endworld”, it is understood that if this happens, there will be coming back from it for anyone. It is the end of everything. By the sixth stanza, the speaker is ready and willing to admit that he does not want anything to do with this battle. He is tired of fighting and tired of being controlled by Castiel and, in turn, by God. He feels like the battle is between angels and demons, of which he is neither and thus has no place in any of it. I used a reference to T.S. Eliot’s “The Hollow Men” in “If the world ends not with a bang but a whimper, I would prefer the silence to battle cries. “ The poem seemed very appropriate to quote, as it is believed by some to have been written from the perspective of a dead man observing the living. The speaker has disconnected himself from most of humanity because of what he has faced in this battle and decides that if at least the end of the world will be quiet, then he will accept it.

Overall, I feel that the poem is very powerful, and even if the reader does not immediately grasp the meaning, they can upon further thought and possibly explanation. It carries a lot of emotion and anger behind it with a general theme of betrayal. I enjoyed writing from this perspective because, for one, the entire view of angels is different from the norm. Also, I was intrigued by the prospect of expressing such a strong emotion. There is a lot of power behind what the speaker says, especially in the finality of his last statement. It sums up his feeling over the situation, I feel, very aptly.